Fear of The End
Current word count: 42,708 New words written: 2,937 Words til goal: 0 / ? words a day til the end of September I finish
Finally, I’m back on track. And I’ve passed my 40K goal for the book — but I haven’t finished the book. As expected, the novel is coming in longer than 40K. I’m guessing it will probably end up around 46K, but that’s fine, because after trimming in the revision, I should have a book that’s about the right word count for a middle grade adventure book.
It feels great to be back on track. That almost 3K words written count is for yesterday morning, this morning and this afternoon (my husband went out to play tennis with instructions for me to finish the book as I’m so close, but I didn’t quite get there; tomorrow maybe).
The interesting thing is, I think I figured out why I was oversleeping early on in the week, and it had nothing to do with being tired. Sure I have been tired. I’m often tired after getting up between 5am and 6am every morning to write, but most mornings I can drag myself out of bed anyway just because I know it’s my time to write. But earlier this week, that wasn’t enough, and I think it’s because I’m coming to the end of the book. I’m at the point of writing the big exciting climax of the story — at least, I hope it’s big and exciting, and that’s the problem. I’m intimidated about my ending.
This happened with my first novel too. I got close to finishing, close to the big climax and froze. I had gotten so far in the story and I was scared of messing it up.
Now I’m at the end of my second novel, and ah ha … same thing.
I got over the hump, but it’s weird, every word I write that gets me closer to the climax of the story (well, I’m currently kinda smack bang in the middle of the climax), I feel a little tug in my head that says, “Are you sure? Don’t do something wrong now.”
To get through it, I keep reminding myself that it’s ok to mess up, that’s what the revisions are for. Writing is rewriting. So, no worries.
Does this happen to anyone else?